I can do anything I want!!

What do you say when your precocious three year old puts her hands on her hips and tells you that its fine if she wants to wear a fleece skirt and ratty old t-shirt to church, because she can do anything she wants!?

I know I responded inappropriately.

I tried hard not to, but I couldn't stop myself. I laughed. Right there while I was looking into her eyes, where she couldn't mistake that I thought what she had just said about being the head cheese was funny.

I know, I know that was the worst thing I could have done. I know that I just reinforced the behavior, and that I am guaranteed to see it again, but if you just could have seen it, her delivery was priceless.

She wasn't even trying to sass me. She just said it all in a matter of fact tone.


J: Mom, I can wear this. I promise its okay.

me: Its not okay honey. We wear our church clothes to church.

J: No, I can wear this its fine.

me: no honey I really need you to change your clothes.

J: Mom its okay I can wear this because I can do anything I want to do. (she didn't raise her voice at all. I was just like it was a regular conversation about the weather.)

me: (I tried to stifle it, to hold it in, but I couldn't, and then I laughed. Not long and hard, but I smiled and chuckled, and she saw me, and she knew that somehow in that little statement she had gained power.)

I am doomed!!

She did change her clothes before church without much fuss, but her response has left me with lots to think about...

How, and when was this line of thinking established?
What have I done to reinforce this feeling of power?
What in the heck is going on in the mind of my three year old?
Does she really think she is She-Ra, Princess of power?
What am I supposed to do with this?
Should I have punished her?

I have been replaying some of the instances that may have left her feeling all powerful. This is what I came up with for the last week.

-The trip to target where she got the sand toys she was really wanting. She thought it was through her powers of persuasion, I thought that it was getting warm enough to play in the sand.

-The day she got the ballet outfit she really wanted, even though she doesn't take a ballet class.

-The fact that I cut all the crust off her bread. Every stinking, long living day!

(I hate this one!! In our house you can pick one thing to be picky about. She picked crust. It all came about when her cousin wanted her apple skin removed Ju-be thought that sounded great. I had to shoot from the hip. There was no way I was cutting off apple skins too, so the rule of having only one eating thing to be weird about was born. It is now referred to weekly. You may want to instate it at your house. It prevents you from doing things like seeding a cucumber or picking the cheese out of the middle of lasagna.)

-The days that I let them build tents out of all the blankets and chairs in the house.

-The fact that she now brushes her own hair. (Yes, at three I have already given up)

Maybe all this indulgence is going straight to her cute little curly head, and now she thinks she is the princess of power. Then again maybe she was just spouting out something one of her little preschool friends said.

I really hope it is the latter.

I don't like thinking that my 3 year old just turned 16 and I am in for a long road of behavior modification. I hate behavior modification.

I wonder if maybe she will some how morph into a nerdy, shy, little book worm who's only desire is to please her parents and be a righteous example to her peer group, who then after graduating high school develops into a very attractive, interesting woman with a PhD who wants to better the world by caring for her children in her home.

I let you know when that all happens.

For now I am off to put princess of power to bed!


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